Silence is a Loaded Gun.

Elliot Rodger killed six people. Already, there are articles citing his “disturbing internet footprint”. Elliot Rodger killed six people, and his internet habits are not unique in the least. In fact, a cursory glance at any comments board on any page on the internet, will show you the disturbing internet footprint of countless young men. Elliot Rodger is not an anomaly, Elliot Rodger is the inevitable conclusion of believing you are owed the world, owed affection, and that you own women. Violence is always the inevitable conclusion of believing a man is above women and simultaneously threatened by women.

It is the paradox of male identity crystallized in the pick up artist community, but is a concept that is at the heart of sexist traditional masculinity. Rape threats are met with shrugs. Men use rape as the only tool of complete psychological impotence. Whether as a threat of violence or as actual physical violence, it is the only act that can not be checked by calm, rational discussion. No debate can stop violence, call-out culture can’t stop violence. Asking your brother, friend, acquaintance to not make rape threats, won’t stop violence. And so all our discussions about violence face the same dilemma – powerlessness. There are wolves in society, and lambs look no less appetizing after a lecture on rape-culture.

Rape is used in the animal kingdom by males who are unable to compete effectively to spread their genes. But in modern society, where procreation must be sublimated to distorted hyper-sexuality, the most base impulses still remain. When men are faced with their own obsolescence they react in the same way as out-competed males in the animal kingdom. What is more useless than an animal who’s genes won’t thrive? What is more useless than a man who’s believes he alone will inherit the earth, and that he earned it, when he finds out it’s all bullshit?

Many will call him a misogynist, but misogyny isn’t like a dude who converted to Islam. He is as much of a misogynist, as he is also an American. These colors don’t run, because these colors run the world. We are all misogynist, because to function in a broken system, one must bend to the system. The nails that stick out, get hammered down. The narrative of success is the story of the White Man, and sure, you can have your own success stories, but best believe when they make your “Based on a True Story” film, it’ll be directed by a white man, written by a white man, and possibly your part will be played by a white man. We must all break ourselves, break our identities, to succeed in America.

I wrote before how I need feminism to try my best to not be as much of misogynist. In fact, not too long after I wrote that piece, I had someone write me to tell me that everything I wrote was bullshit, cause they knew for sure multiple instances where I was a sexist pig. But that’s exactly the point, there’s no one out there who’s gonna win the gold star for Best Feminist. And if you’re a dude, you most certainly don’t deserve any accolades for trying your best to not be your worst. It is precisely the worst of us, who will do the most harm. It is the worst of me, who I’ll have to apologize for. It is the worst of all men, that we have to be forced to choose between believing the masculine worst of ourselves, or the feminine weakness of ourselves. The dichotomy of masculinity MAN UP or PUSSY OUT. When you’ve chosen from this rigged system, you find that you’ve been ripped off.

But this is part of the public conversation of “What/Who’s a feminist?” On the outside, the public perception is completely wrong, Feminism equals Misandry. On the inside, Feminism is constantly policed from within on a checklist of “Are you or have you ever been, a member of the Misogynist party?” If you don’t got your papers in order, your feminism is revoked. All we are left with is Feminism as another meme. A meme that does nothing more but propagate itself like a virus. When years and years of academic discussions of racism/sexism/any-ism gets condensed to soundbites, 140 character tweets, and tumblr reblogs, we are no longer effecting change. We are now the problem. Feminism has failed every single time a guy decides to say “I prefer to call myself a Humanist,” when that dude is more likely to call himself a WWF fan on a job resume. The conversation is not reaching the population. In fact, I believe the conversation is becoming more and more insular.

Feminism has failed when half the discussion during any news bit with a feminist, is spent discussing “Why the word feminist?” To me, it’s the equivalent of asking a trans person about their genitals, every. fucking. time. there’s any news about a trans person that isn’t their murder or humiliation.
The meme-ification of -Isms, means there’s no actual analysis of our own positions. We are right, they are wrong. There’s also never any exposure of our vulnerabilities. There’s no examination of the enemy, and let me be bold, but a man killed six women because he was lonely yesterday. The enemy is real, and we’re losing. Many people slam the Pick Up Artist community, myself included. But I don’t know how many conversations I’ve had with people who have never read one pick-up artist book, or hung out with a pick up artist, or had any kind of conversation with one that didn’t start out with the premise that they were gross and sexist. The most famous book, “The Pick Up Artist — the New and Improved Art of Seduction,” is at its core a sales marketing manual repackaged with sexist terminology. It is genius marketing in itself, because sex doesn’t sell (the porn industry is bleeding since porn went free) sexism sells. Get rid of the sexist coat of paint, and you have the concept of negging, and girls be like “DOES THAT EVER WORK ON ANYONE?” The answer is yes and no. When you’ve got a product to sell, even if it’s the same old shit as last year, you tell them that their dishes aren’t clean enough, their linens aren’t white enough, their skin isn’t young enough, their waist isn’t thin enough. Every single ad directed at women is a form of negging. And the advertisers have proven that yes, it does work on enough people to make a profit.
Elliot Rodger is the death of the salesman. But rather than running out and killing himself to exercise some degree of control over his life, the new Willy Loman goes out and blasts some people before leaving the stage. Willy Loman in Boston, Willy Loman in Sandy Hook, Willy Loman in Virginia Tech, Willy Loman in Aurora, Willy Loman in Columbine. A society-wide delusion, that all men are created equal, that all men have earned their position, that all men are glorious. Every time it happens, we have a discussion on gun laws. Pointless — a man will find a way to kill six people because he is lonely, with or without a gun. We have a discussion about misogyny. Pointless – we are all misogynists and the individual agents are as obsolete as paper-encyclopedias. We’ll focus on the lone gunman. We have a discussion about feminism. Pointless — a lone gunman isn’t listening. He has tuned out from any conversation, years ago.We get so stuck on having a conversation about the conversation, that dudes go their whole lives without ever considering “Do you want all mothers to be treated how you love your mother? Do you want all sisters to be treated how you love your sister?” I am careful to say, not how they treat their mothers or treat their sisters, but how they love them. We never have the conversation about how we fail ourselves and others, because the way we treat people is different than how we love them. If you’re a dude that calls himself a humanist, then you have to start treating women as human. Humanism should be enough, but it isn’t. “All men are created equal” still found plenty of room to not include most men, women, and children.
Elliot Rodger made a series of videos, put them on the internet, so that someone would listen. He was lost in the background noise of all the other men who are just as vile as he. He was lost in the static between radio stations. We are out there, as lonely as a Numbers Station, rattling off a series of cryptic messages that only the recipients can understand. To an outsider, the Numbers Station is eerie and disturbing. We are paranoid about its function, suspicious that it must be sinister. Many Numbers Stations use the voice of a woman or a child, which makes it even more unsettling. A man makes a youtube video, “Why do girls hate me so much?” and many will try to reply and answer, and now seek to explain why he answered himself with a gun, after killing six others.He didn’t just kill six people. He killed 4 men, 2 women. Misogyny doesn’t mean he just hated women, he hated other men just as much. He called them losers. In the cruel arithmetic of his mind, the women were simply objects. “Why did these objects hate me?” not “I hate these objects.” He still coveted them. The men, they didn’t have his looks, his $300 shades, his BMW, his clothes. All objects. He killed the owners of objects, then killed himself, because he owned the one thing every man has to get rid of — virginity. It all adds up, not just to him, but for so many men, that we aren’t worth anything at all. But if we’re supposed to be at the top, you lose faith in everything else. Nothing is worth anything if i’m worthless. A voice that is not worth listening to, “mansplaining.” But until feminism finds a way to reach the most vile, we remain sheeps to the slaughter.How do we try to elevate ourselves from the position of livestock? How do we lower ourselves to speak in the language of a savage? This is what is missing from any discussion, from every conversation where we end up speaking past each other. For me, I drop the academic parlance. I’m not a women’s studies major, I’m not even a college graduate. I drop the moral high ground. I’m not good at “examining my own privilege” cause that’s the goddamn privilege of privilege.
I drop the language-policing. I don’t care if you say racist or sexist shit around me if we’re homies, being offensive is often a bonding experience for any groups of people, and context can’t be forgotten every time I hear a word I don’t like. It’s not up to me to tell you how to act, it’s only up to me to show you how I act. We’d like to believe that if we simply took out all the offensive words from our language, we’d suddenly be a nicer group of people. That’s fucking idiotic. The offensive word treadmill will always continue. No one cares that I just used the word “idiot,” because we found a newer word to be offended about. It’s why I don’t use the term “People of Color” because i’m not an alien from another planet. I’m a very light brown, I’m not some color chart you buy at the paint store. And when a grandma says “colored person” to describe a black person, I don’t have very good logic to explain why “Colored Person” and “Person of Color” exist as polar opposites on the acceptable terminology scale. All I have is the history, and the knowledge that in 50 years, we might be saying “Melanin-deficient” to describe a Caucasian.
I drop out of calling people out. Even when I’ve done it, I know that it’s 100% about me and never about who I’m calling out. When Brendan McCarthy (a comics dude) said some racist shit, yeah, I “called him out,” but not because I particularly cared that he said some racist shit, but because he was drawing the covers to the comic I was working on. Cash rules everything around me, CREAM, Get the dummy, don’t bother my dollar bills y’all. I won’t ever pretend that I want to change his mind, that I will change his mind, or that I’ve helped make the world a better place. I’ll call someone out if it affects my day-to-day life, because being offended is not about making change. Being offended is about me. Its not enough to just be offended. Congratulations on doing nothing. Being offended doesn’t mean you care. Actions are the only things that create change, and no, twitter doesn’t count. I’m only as much of an “activist” as “How can I draw this comic differently according to my beliefs?” Thats as much as I care about any issue. I’ve got no authority on this subject.
I drop the qualification selection, I’m not gonna ask you to explain to me why you won’t call yourself a feminist, even though when asked “Should women have equal rights as men?” your answer is “Yes.” The answer is all that fucking matters. I once was hanging out with three dudes. Two guys my age, one guy was in his forties/fifties. One guy from the east coast, the other two from the midwest. We were all out drinking beers, at a bar with a racist name, all talking about the shared experiences of different types of violence. Getting in a fight, having a fight for fun, getting hit by our fathers, and then, tragically, the oldest man spoke about getting beat and humiliated by his father and mother. It was disturbing to hear, but it was a necessary experience to learn for the rest of us, just kinda casually discussing some minor scuffles in our young lives. It was some real talk, and then the oldest man started dropping the N-bomb. I respected the guy, and he respected me, and so as a joke, I said how I voted for Obama because he was black (That’s actually true, but it was still phrased as a joke at the time). He went crazy! He asked me “I know you’re a smart guy, talking to you, I know you got your head on straight. But you must be lying. I know you’re not a liberal!” On and on. And so I asked him “Is it possible that talking to me is better proof of what a liberal is, than what you’ve decided in your head?” I’m a Cuban American from NJ, my mom is blacker than me, my dad is more spanish than me, i’m also mostly liberal, mostly straight, and if I spent the whole time explaining exactly what those all meant to me, he never would’ve been vulnerable to admit that the violence in his life should have never happened to anyone.What haven’t we learned, every time we tune out, turn off, drop the convo? For men, there’s a war going on inside, no one is safe from. Silence is a loaded gun.
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Dear Mister Misses

I have black friends, spanish friends, and I’m a mix of mexican and white. But there is nothing more I hate than driving through the ghettos and seeing people not take care of where they live. Waiting for the government to do something about it. Is that racist?

The government is a magical thing. They are simultaneously the most and least capable group of people on the planet. Which government? Any government. It allows us to blame a higher power for all of the bad things and good things we believe exist. But unlike God, we can prove that a government exists. But also unlike God, it is not nearly as powerful as you think it is.

The delusion that poverty is deserved, that poverty may also be a result of of a person’s race, and that a symptom of that race is laziness, isn’t just racism…it’s stupidity. You get so angry that you have to give your precious dollars to feed hungry kids and hungry old folks (which makes up more than half of the recipients of food stamps), you get so angry that minorities are just acting like savage animals, and you get so angry that ghettos exist taking advantage of the poor gullible Government. The same government that you probably believe is manipulative, greedy and taking advantage of you. There’s a reason it’s called government housing, because the gov’t came up with the idea. Its no coincidence that ghettos look like Prison Industrial Complexes, that the creeping police cars and closed circuit cameras function as a virtual panopticon. The ghetto isn’t an accident, and the people living there aren’t waiting for the gov’t to help them out, they are wishing someone would open the cage. Instead, you drive on by, like a man gawking at Ota Benga, believing he’s taking advantage of the zookeepers.

Your language implies that you believe these people are parasites, but they are not.The ghettoes aren’t the parasites on society, the completely corporate controlled government is the parasite on the people. And hundreds of years of racist policies have been designed to disenfranchise whole segments of the population. These same racist policies haven’t stopped at just affecting one race, it has become full on class/race/gender warfare.

Keep the proles hungry and stupid, fighting each other, and they will never rise up. You should’ve read 1984 when you were in highschool. But instead, you probably believe 1984 was the year of the last great American President – Ronald Reagan. The almighty god of the conservative right, who wages a war on terror from the grave. Freedom from the tyranny of the unwashed masses. A holy crusade against everyone who isn’t a rich man. There ain’t no section 8 housing in their heaven.

http://mistermisses.tumblr.com/

The Mysterious Friend-Zone

Oftentimes, when a repugnant thought enters the cultural consciousness, it cuts through people like two land masses experiencing a seismic rift. One side defends it “It’s just a joke!” or “It really happens!” and the other responds “That is offensive, women owe you nothing,” “You’re a neckbeard loser”. But no one really ever sits down and think “Why the fuck are we even discussing this?” Even repugnant ideas come from somewhere, and enough people must experience them for it to catch on as a meme.

Even fedoras were once cool, so cool, that every dude almost had to wear them. Now fedoras exist in the uncomfortable realm of Bros, Nerds, and the Pickup Artist Community (THE LOVECHILD OF BROS AND NERDS). The Pickup Artist community deserves its whole separate deconstruction, so i’ll save that for later. But the Friend-Zone didn’t just appear as a boogie man of men’s rights activists. The Friend-Zone exists because men and women have been socialized to ignore each other and suppress their desires.

What we’re talking about when people discuss the Friend-Zone, has been unfortunately gendered and distorted. It simply is the very modern result of relaxed sexual mores coming into conflict with traditional gender roles. There does exist an uncomfortable situation that occurs before or after sex occurs with a new person-of-interest, where one of the persons (at least) is unsure of what role the other should take. When you hear Nerds and Bros and PUAs speaking about this, this is why they need feminism. Unfortunately, they are often too pigheaded and stubborn to see that. The patriarchy has failed them, because when the strict codes of behavior begin breaking down on how to interact with women, those last vestiges morph into an artificial reward/punishment structure….a game.

There are nice guys, and bad boys. Sluts and Virgins. How to score. How to get past “No.” Even feminist theory plays the game, “Yes means yes” “Are you privileged?” “Weight loss and Feminism.” Each person has their avatar, and each person must play the game of interacting with the opposite gender in such a way that a winner is you.

Unfortunately, all a game amounts to in the real world is manipulation of others. And you only need to manipulate others, if you’re unsure you’ll get what you want by simply asking for it. We can’t just ask for it though, because there’s the undeniable fear that removing oneself from the game also removes yourself from the rewards. One tolerates the punishments, in hope of eventually obtaining the reward. It’s the sunk costs fallacy writ large. We’ve been playing this game for so long, for generations, that we can’t discard it without tearing each other apart.

Why is the Friend-Zone a meme so easily grasped by Bros and Nerds, opposites on the social stigma spectrum? Perhaps Bros and Nerds are identical in their complete social-acceptance of modern male-chauvinist brainwashing. The Bro is an alpha dog, the Nerd is King of the Nerds. The Bro says she deserves it, the Nerd says she doesn’t even know who Rocket Raccoon is. United are they, in their inability to see past their limited male-centric bubble. All the while, dating remains with the male’s sphere of influence. The old traditional ways still define that the man pursues, the man is hyper sexual, the man provides. Sadly, this also means the man isn’t responsible for his emotions and his mistakes.

Dating still exists, but it’s also dissolved into hooking up, hanging out, casual sex, open relationships, “it’s complicated” status changes, FB stalking, Snapchat, Tinder, bisexual, pansexual, asexual, try-sexual. The BroNerd is a caveman in an increasingly complex world. Traditional roles only allowed for so much complexity. You could only play if you were straight and stayed with your own kind. Gay? Sorry, can’t play. Get out and die. Interracial? Sorry, can’t play. Get out and die. BDSM? Sorry, can’t play and SHUTUP SHUTUP SHUTUP! If you wanted to just get a god damn blow job, you had to pay for it. Literally. Don’t ask your wife to do that. The BroNerd doesn’t have the vocabulary to even discuss what he wants, but he also hasn’t been given the emotional complexity to vocalize it even if he could.

I’m focusing on the BroNerd, and speaking about men, because it’s what i know from first hand experience. I am a mostly straight dude. I’ve been “friendzoned” (I was afraid/unable to tell a person what i want and the person didn’t know what they want enough to tell me). But for every bro, for every nerd, there’s also a woman who has grown up believing the exact same quasi-traditional American beliefs. Women are just as socialized to be pursued, to be demure, to receive. This also means that a woman, in American society, is completely responsible for all emotions (the male’s too) and for all their mistakes.

What you end up with, is the broken situation where a woman is unable to be sexual, but wants sex, but will be punished for wanting sex, so often learns that to be pursued provides the most rewards in life. Even something like “slutwalks” or naked protests, quite obviously traffics in agreeable male patriarchal desires, while simultaneously attempting to subvert them but reaping the traditional rewards — attention, consideration, discussion. How often do feminist articles explore questions like “Is Miley Cyrus a feminist?” “Is wearing a hijab feminist?” as a result of the inability to separate a woman’s appearance from the reward system of the male gaze. Those questions would be as irrelevant as a man’s nipples, if a man’s gaze didn’t value women’s nipples. Existence is a reward itself, when your very gender makes you invisible in many walks of life. Modern dating rewards women who are pursuable, but does not ever reward being the pursuer, or the result of being pursued: sex. It does however reward being purchased: traditional marriage. How can a woman define what they want, when all the new choices afforded to her are still linked with punishments. Own your sexuality? You better be ready to discuss it. Don’t want to have children? You gotta talk to a man about that first. Silence is the only refuge, and that’s perfectly okay for men who don’t want to listen.

For a man, conquest at any cost is rewarded. Even if it destroys your own soul. A “nice guy” values conquest too, he only defines it as a “girlfriend” but it’s really a wimp’s way of making a marriage purchase. The BroNerd is a caveman, only able to communicate in grunts. And grunts are all it needs. He doesn’t have to discuss how much sex he wants or how he goes about getting it. He doesn’t want children, he’s just a busy guy. Grunts are good for aggression, and that’s perfectly okay for men who don’t know what to say. Together, cavemen and cavewomen get along just fine, one grunts while the other is silent.  The world is changing however. As we navigate these changing social norms, we are all evolving, because we are all in some way dealing with our traditional gender role baggage. Evolution occurs when an animal must adapt to a changing environment. Those who do not adapt, perish. The caveman is going extinct. And its death is seen on arguments on a Facebook wall. In death, it is flailing about in complex new encounters between the sexes, like a cricket with broken legs trying to sing a song of seduction.

Traditions seek to control the environment by limiting the amount of possibilities. Ain’t no bird gonna fly if you always get shot. But our world has become truly global, and our traditions are crashing against other traditions, and creating new ones.  Thats where the Friend-Zone came from, and it won’t go away until we’ve discovered a new paradigm. Until a woman won’t be punished for just wanting a friend, punished for just wanting sex, punished for just wanting to be monogamous, then it’ll be impossible to tell a man exactly what they want. Nor will men, who treat sexual conquest as a reward, who see friendship as simply a path to conquest, and face no consequences for being single or married, ever be able to see past their socially impaired tunnel vision. Caveman can’t talk, caveman can’t understand. Cavewoman gets hit when she speaks, cavewoman can’t understand why.

For now, when I go on a date, I try to pay for it while looking really cool and like I didn’t really even think about it, so that she doesn’t think I’m trying to be some throwback but still values traditional status symbols like affluence and confidence, and if she really wants to pay for herself, I just ask three times — very casually — and then let her. That’s a lot of complex decision-making just to pay for a burger. It’s really annoying, but BroNerds just ain’t got the higher reasoning skills to deal. Also, yes, I just humble bragged cause I’m still playing the game. Don’t hate the player, hate the game, it makes losers of us all.

further reading –

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2013/10/131008-women-handprints-oldest-neolithic-cave-art/

 

Dear Mister Misses

What do you think of a fit guy with a plus size woman? and would you date a plus size woman?

Dear Cooking for Cannibals,

Dear Mister Misses

Mister Misses, 
Ive been with my girl for over 2years and I’ve got mad love & respect for her. 
Three months ago she told me that she had a spiritual revelation and had decided that in order for her to deepen her relationship with god, she need to be celibate. We talked in length about how she defined engaging in no sex what’s so ever and how she wasn’t sure how long this new “pact with Jesus” would last. For over the past month I’ve had insomnia while I’m at her apartment. Lucky for me her roommate is a good friend of mine {I hooked them up as roomies}. She usually comes in from clubbing late while my girlfriend is sleeping and has taken pity on my situation. She cooks for me, hangs out and suggests porn before going in her room. We’ve never hooked up in all the years we’ve been friends but I think theres a mutual attraction.(I don’t really trust my mind to be accurately making that call given my current state of sexual frustration) 
My girl and I have spoken several times about what my role in her new spiritual devotion is. She understands it is unfair to deny me sexual gratification but thinks that this is also a testament to my love for her.
Here’s the thing, as much as I love my girl, I’m finding it harder and harder to resist pushing up on my friend with the hope of hooking up with her. 
Should I continue to justify my love or feast on my friend?

Dear Raptured Lovelife,

There are lots of terrible things a person can do in life. You can kill someone, you can lie constantly, you can call someone ugly to their face and mean it, you can make a person feel inhuman–and of all the things a person can do wrong, for some reason, some religious people have decided that the worst thing a person can do is get laid. Even if you’re both two of the most in love people, even if you’re doing it with the most honest heart, some people can’t see sex as anything but somehow twisted. This I don’t understand, and although I believe in God, I will ask people, why would a God provide us with all the faculties of reason, if he did not intend us to make our own reasoned decisions about things?

But this is a foolish argument, because I soon learned, that the reason one uses to believe in God itself, is not the same reason that can be summarily dismissed with logic. Yes, you can provide any number of paradoxes, thought experiments and the like, but at the end of the day, the person will just say “So? I still believe this.” So when she believes that her pact with Jesus now invalidates your previous pact you have with her, you should take that serious, and leave.

There is no reason to cheating, you can fuck whoever-whenever in this day and age. If you make a commitment to someone, then you should stick to it. Why do I believe one should honor their obligations? Because if you give up  the concept that promises mean something, it’s just that much harder for you to accept them from someone else. You just can’t find trust and love, if you invalidate their central precepts. So to preserve the ability to find someone who is much more in line with your philosophical leanings, in the future, do not destroy what you have with this person. Simply accept that these are irreconcilable differences, and sadly, walk away.

Ultimately, it’s not your partner that defines the relationship YOU want, regardless of how they define their relationship with your or god. Some things you can’t compromise on, and deciding what’s important to you in a relationship not only protects your heart, but your girlfriend as well.

Jesus taught a man how to fish, so he can feed himself forever. This is good dating advice too. Cast your line again, there’s plenty of fish in the sea.

Dear Mister Misses

I am unhappy and I feel numb and desensitized lately, and I even thought about suicide for about 5 minutes. What shocked me was that I felt indifferent to dying and living equally. How can I get my emotions back?

Dear Peter Pan’s Shadow,

Every once in awhile we go through these dark days, and some people have more of the dark days than others. The shitty thing about being depressed, is it’s like trying to make a sand castle on the edge of the sea. The waves keep on crashing around you, til you just sit there and feel that indescribable sinking feeling.

Everyone always wants to feel better, but it’s hard to really figure out how. I can just say “Pick yourself up and keep moving,” but that never sounds like a solution when you feel stuck. Nonetheless, i think we have a natural automatic way of dealing with depression, when things get so bad, sometimes your mind just disconnects. Call it dissociation, feeling numb, not giving a fuck, blegh or whatevz, everyone’s had that feeling where you just feel grey. It’s your mind’s way of shielding itself, putting a limit on your pain, and letting you continue.

In a way, it’s a good thing, because if you can recognize that you’re just not caring for too long, then that recognition alone is a moment of caring. Caring about not caring, caring that you thought about suicide, feeling shocked by indifference, these are all healthy reactions, even if you’re dealing with very unhealthy thoughts.

Your emotions will come back, when you want them back. When you want to feel better, you’ll have to let yourself feel bad first. Grieving, loneliness, anger are all useful, but you must direct them towards a purpose, or they turn inward and rot the core.

But this, above all, is something i want to stress. If ANYONE is ever feeling so terrible, they are thinking about suicide, make sure you do one thing right after. Call someone. Call anyone. Call a hotline, I know they are out there, but call your friends and family too. No one needs to give up, no one needs to fall victim to depression and other related diseases, and believe me, things always get better.

Depressed person says “No it won’t. Things just keep getting worse.” I agree, things would get a lot worse without you around 😦